::alio!::

In Which Ottawa Gets Its Ass Kicked

off the top:
I was coming home on the Queensway tonight, and there was this huge sign flashing at me: "TUNE INTO LOCAL RADIO STATION" and then "AMBER ALERT." I thought, "WTF?" so when I got home, I tried to check it out. NOTHING. I don't know what the hell's going on.

the score:
LALIME MUST GO. 'Nuff said. He's just not getting that confidence that everyone else says he's going to get. Hell, even Don Cherry was on his side tonight, saying that everyone should just let him play, and he'll get back his form. WHAT FORM? Piffle, I say. Play Super-K and all will be good.

It does mean I'll have to redesign this page, but I can deal . . .

Nothing much to say about tonight. Wade Redden played his 600th NHL game, all in a Senators uniform. With his big butt. He did not have a good game.

Not that anyone else was particularly stellar.

For the record, though: no matter what you say to me, you evil detractors, to me, Marian Hossa is mega ultra hot. You can't sway me on that. Look at him! He's cute! Although he did look funny tonight with cotton stuffed up his nose and blood smeared all over his face. He did not have a good game tonight, especially when they kept showing the replay of him running away from a possible scuffle. I guess he changed his mind after they nearly broke his nose, though, because he was right in the middle of it later on.

Special stupids of the night go to Hnidy, for being utterly unable to fight in a proper manner, and to Rachunek, for trying to pass behind the net and only serving to put it directly in front of Lalime. To his credit, though, he genuinely seemed like he felt awful for letting that goal happen. Maybe just because it messed with his +/-. Not that it was that great to begin with. He did not have a good game.

There were two players who didn't do all that badly, however.

Let's all stand back a moment and applaud Alfie. Gesus, Toronto booed him every time he so much looked at the puck, and he still scored first. Kudos.

In a game filled with stupid skirmishes and even stupider penalties (Belfour should've gotten way more than the mere two he did get -- it's not cool to be vicous with your paddle, yo), a particular fighter stands out, partly because he stands tall, and partly because he stands firm. Chara's fight with McCabe was fucking hilarious. McCabe fell down halfway through his beating, but Chara wasn't finished with him, and so picked him bodily off the ice and practically threw him away. It was the most amazing Chara fight I have ever seen. Unfortunately, someone caught him with a stick under his pads, and it looks like he'll be out with a kidney injury for the next one. Scratch Spezza, too, who took a mean tumble that twisted his knee in an uncomfortable way. They say it's a "contusion." Who knows?

off the ice:
So Domi wore his visor to this game. Pity they didn't call him on the instigator penalty when he had it all ready to take off before his first fight. What a little twit . . .

in other news:
Went with Cait and Stef tonight to Stef's friend Andy's house, and met his posse. A bunch of nice boys. Very heavy on the nerd-speak, which Cait participated in, but nice nonetheless.

I'm glad January's over. It was so long. These past two weeks, especially. Bad incidences on top of bad incidences . . . a set of unfortunate circumstances that put me some place I didn't want to be last night . . . I have a lot of things to think about now.

I haven't written so much in my diary since I started blogging here. I mean, it's not like I post my deepest secrets on the internet, but I think I'm just so orthographically drained when I'm done this that I feel no great urge to write any more about myself. I'll prolly put in a few words tonight, though . . .

Sleep well, folks.

I ate a big apple.

off the top:
The Coyotes have funny names. Suchy sounds like SUSHI. Nagy = NAGGY. SPILLER. Then there's SAVAGE. And a few more. Check it out yourself.

Fun fact: the Coyotes, to commemorate Boucher's record-breaking shutout run, actually GAVE Brian the NET he was in front of when he was finally scored upon. NEAT!

Fun fact #2: since the 1996-1997 season, the Ottawa Senators are 229-12-18-1 when leading going into the third period. And that includes last night's complete and utter fuck-up. AMAZING!

the score:
FIRST PERIOD: The Sens had much more jump than they did during last night's game. As I predicted, Super-K got the start, and was sharp from the first, even during the penalty incurred by Phillips at the 30-second mark. A nice play by Neil and Smolinski gave Spezza a second chance at the net, and he knocked the puck in at a weird angle to put Ottawa up early. It would have been two points, but, yet again, a Schastlivy bullet went way high. He needs some serious batting practise. Apparently, he has ONE ASSIST in his past TWENTY-THREE GAMES. Anyway, at the end of the first, Ottawa 1, Phoenix 0.

SECOND PERIOD: Did you see NASH's hair? I swear it's twice as long as Alfie's. He's more of a muppet, becuase he's a pest, too, and prides himself on being irritating, like his little altercation with Neil, and then Phillips, in the space of ten seconds. I never noticed this before, but as long as you have one foot onside, you're onside. That's pretty cool. There was an odd break by the fourth line in the second, with Neil and Vanner having two really good chances at the net. The resulting penalty drawn by Vanner saw two minutes of steady pressure by Ottawa's power play unit. They barely left the zone, which meant that the Coyotes didn't have a chance to change. They were tired and out played, and Alfie capitalized on that, taking a nice pass from Redden and slamming it home, just nicking off Langfeld on the way in to raise the score a notch in Ottawa's favour. The second period was a very north-south game, with few calls. The stupid tripping call on Wee Tad was an exception. But the period went by very quickly, marked by some fabulous saves by Super-K, including his now-patented "face save," which, it seems, he does on purpose. He's either really brave, or really stupid. Ottawa 2, Phoenix 0.

THIRD PERIOD: Another stellar twenty minutes by Super-K. As his confidence grows, so does his save percentage. I don't know what happened to the Sens' 88% on the PK, but it went to hell in the third. Phoenix would've tied it, but Nagy missed, so only Doan's goal made it past number 31. More action by the fourth line in this period, as well. I'm very impressed that the goon line is offensively productive. Not many teams have four dangerous lines. That's depth. Spezza's second of the night came just as magically as his first, flying in from the corner for a redirect from Smolinski. Spezza didn't get the hat tonight, however, but he came close. He's probably cursing Boucher for robbing him late in the third. Before that, though, there was some serious tension around the empty Coyote net, several good chances before Alfie finally booted it in. His victory was marred somewhat, however, by the fact that when he got back to his bench, he blew his nose onto the ice in an amazingly projectile manner. I don't know whether to be impressed, or puke.

Four guys who played well tonight but never made it on the scoreboard: Chara played his 200th game as a Senator tonight. He was in all the right places at the right times, and his two penalties were solely because he was protecting a teammate (in the first instance, it was Philly, and in the second, it was Neil). Hossa, indubitably the fastest man on the ice tonight, had so many chances it's amazing that he didn't even get an assist on the night. I'm still taking bets on his place in the scoring race. Right now, he's third. Schaefer was another playmaker tonight, using his strength to be gritty when it was needed, and his legs to be speedy when that was important. Phillips, doing a nice job as assistant captain tonight, talking to the officials and giving orders, was extremely effective on defence, using his sheer size to simply shut down his opponents. Well done, boys.

off the ice:
I had a discussion with Jon today about the goalie decision (hell, it was more interesting than the difference between calcareous ooze and siliceous ooze). He made some good points for the Patty school, but I'm glad Super-K started tonight. I don't think Patty's going to rebound like everyone thinks he will. He never seems to. Whenever he makes a bad start and then plays the game after, there's none of that snap that one would expect from someone who just had life slap him in the face. I think Martin's playing of Super-K tonight is a sign of his waning confidence in his number one, and I think we're going to see Super-K play a couple of playoff games if this continues.

Nice to see Langfeld back in the game tonight. Granted, it comes at a price -- Havlat has injured his groin (AGAIN). I'm worried that this will be a continuous thing, like Lemieux's hip.

*Ahem.* I don't know what it is -- perhaps it's just the way he ties his shirt, but Redden's butt looks like a goalie butt -- BIG. (Sorry, Jen, but he looks funny in uniform)

OOOH, next game is against the hated LEAFS! Things you learn from the colour guys: Mike Weir and his caddy, Mr. Little, were in the audience for tonight's game. Weir, a Leafs fan, and Little, a Sens fan, apparently argue stats between shots during tournaments. Anyway, as Dean Brown said, "Hate makes good Hockey." He's right. This should be a good one.

in other news:
I have far too much hockey paraphernalia. Too much. Funnily enough, I only actually purchased three of these items myself. One is an Alfredsson tshirt, which cost me $20, one is a little pewter glove keychain, which cost me $10, and the other is a wee Alfredsson jersey that I got at McD's, and which cost me $2. The rest of it is just scary. I have, in my possession, the following:

Wee Alfredsson jersey

Ottawa Senators glove keychain

Alfredsson tshirt

Hossa tshirt, from Jon

"I love Marian Hossa" tshirt, made lovingly by Jen

Hossa authentic jersey, from my brothers

Alfredsson "Official" puck, from Sam

Ottawa Senators Hossa/Lalime/Spezza poster, from Jay

Ottawa Senators Holiday poster, from Stef

Ottawa Senators "Cuddle Blanket," from Sarah

Ottawa Senators toque and gloves, from Sam

Book of Hockey Trivia, from Jen

Ottawa Senators rug, from my parents

Ottawa Senators remote control zamboni, from Cait

You are only encouraging me, you know!

Tautology vs. Teleology

the score:
It was a night in which former Senators shone and present Senators didn't.

Both teams have ridiculous records when they score first. Unfortunately for Ottawa fans, Oliver, a former Sen, took advantage of a bad Rachunek play and knocked it past Patty to give the Stars a 1-0 lead early in the first.

This period was marked by a lot of giveaways on Ottawa's part, in which the players, especially Lalime, were out of position too often. Now, they were lucky this time, but Dallas was all over Ottawa for the first twenty minutes. Smolinski took a beating at centre that left him winded for about five minutes, but he was soon back in the game.

At the end of the period, an absolutely BEAUTIFUL goal by Martin Havlat was called off due to the fact that Bonk got himself a penalty. Radek's night was only to get worse.

In the second, it seemed that Ottawa had awakened from their slumber. What helped the most, I think, was the vicious hit to Leschyshyn at the boards by Ott, who got himself a five-minute major for charging and a game misconduct. Curtis got a lot of blood on the ice and had to be guided off, holding a rapidly darkening towel to his face. He got twenty-two stitches, but is apparently all right. (Note: he was wearing a visor.)

In the resulting extended power play, the Senators capitalized twice with pretty passes by Marian Hossa, resulting in goals by Martin Havlat and Wade Redden. Things were looking up.

However, Vermette took a foolish double minor for high-sticking that left Ottawa shorthanded. During this play, Marty Turco came out of his net and almost to the blueline to play keep-away with the puck. More than one player wondered what the hell he was up to. Then, with all Dallas players in the Ottawa zone, Peter Schaefer dodged around a Star and scooted his way up the ice, shorthanded. Turco, seeing that he was all alone, sailed out to meet Peter, and went down to block the shot in the left face-off circle. This effectively shut Schaefer down -- but no! Schaefer has a uniquely curved stick, in that it more resembles a shovel than any form of puck-handling equipment. So he scooped the puck OVER Turco and skated around him, batting the puck (FROM MID-AIR) into the net as he passed by. Ottawa 3, Dallas 1.

In the third period, everything fell to utter shit.

Lalime's ears must've been burning, because the talk between periods was all about him. Is he good enough to bring a Stanley Cup to Ottawa? It seemed to the colour commentators that he was "too small in net" to be effective, especially on the short side. Now, keep in mind that Patrick Lalime, although 6'3", barely weighs 190 lb. on a good day. Of COURSE he's small in net. But all this talk can't be good for one's psyche, and it showed in Lalime. Lucky so far in the game, his fortunes changed in the third as he was caught out of position time and time again. Things looked brighter for a split second as a Smolinski shot rang off Turco's crossbar, but it was a done deal for Ottawa when Dallas scored its fourth goal by trickling it very slowly past the diminuitive Ottawa goaltender. I got up about halfway through the third and ate a slice of pizza, hoping that it would give the Senators the inspiration to play a slice-worthy game. Apparently, it only served to give Patty indigestion. The fat lady was already singing when they beat Patty again -- and again, on the short side -- to make the score 5-3.

I'm not excusing the Senators' play tonight. Let's face it, they were crap. Two notable exceptions were Smolinski, who took advantage of every opportunity that came his way, and who came back despite being hammered in a major way, and Hossa, who put everything together in the second to give his team their only lead. But four unanswered goals in the third period is not acceptable elite team behaviour. I bet Jacques Martin is going to rip into them all the way to Phoenix. How long is that flight? Better hope it's short.

To give them a little credit, though, the officiating had something to do with it. The referees didn't call much tonight, but when they did, it was pretty major. In the first two periods, the calls were pretty balanced. In the third (and I hate it when they do this, because it happens all the time), they tried to balance out the score a little by letting Dallas get away with stuff and by calling Ottawa on things they should have gotten away with. An example of this was when Vermette was tripped in the Dallas zone and hauled completely off his feet. No call. A few seconds later, Chara hooks a Dallas player and gets two minutes. I suppose the officials want to make it more interesting for the fans, but it just means that the players keep second-guessing themselves as to what exactly they can and can't do, and it makes for a frustrating game.

Crappy defensive play aside, that is.

So, then, who is the goaltender who's going to fulfill Alfie's promise to bring the Cup home?

off the ice:
Philly tied their game tonight, leaving them with 66 points, one ahead of loser Toronto, and two ahead of Ottawa, for first place in the Eastern Conference.

Eric Lindros left tonight's game after colliding with Doig and then fighting him. Rumour has it, he has a slight concussion. Here's a little bit of foreshadowing.

Dany Heatley was back in the game tonight for the first time (six months ahead of schedule) since the car accident that killed teammate and friend Dan Snyder. Heatley had some good shots on net, but, in the end, had to be satisfied with a 3-3 tie.

in other news:
This is what I'm listening to right now, and it will shortly be followed by this. Then maybe some Ella. I have all three thousand someodd songs on my playlist right now. On random. Makes for an eclectic mix. I'm trying to identify the sound at the beginning of "Dare You to Move." It's sort of like a combination of a wooden spoon moving around in an empty saucepan, and something ceramic rubbing against something else bowl-shaped and ceramic. What do you think?

What a long month January has been! It seems like forever ago that I totally lacerated my hand, took my brothers to hockey games, and got the flu. Each day seems to drag on and on, melding ever-so-slowly into an interminable week. February seems to go faster. It's a couple of days shorter, so it had better. In general, though, I've noticed that time goes faster in university than it does when you're younger. I guess it's because you have more things to do, more responsibilities . . . still, it's weird for me to look back and say, where did the past twenty-two years of my life go? HAHAH! Don't worry, I'm not going through a midlife crisis. I just find it harder and harder these days to distinguish between the pleasant haze of memories that clouds my history. I can't remember, for instance, if I cut my hair after grade eleven or after grade twelve. I can't bring to mind what year it was the first time I got drunk (although that's probably because I WAS drunk). Stuff like that. I still remember it, but I can't always remember when. I break all the phases of my life into where I was living at the time: Nova Scotia, England, Victoria, Ottawa . . . At least that gives me plus or minus five years to choose from in each situation.

My friend Alice sent me this great time-waster today. I never get to see her very often, because every time we make plans together, they always fall completely to shit. So, in the three years I've known her, I've maybe seen her a grand total of four times, and that doesn't include the class we had together in first year. She's an Art and Culture major, which isn't really supported at Carleton, so she's thinking of switching schools (if she hasn't already), and I'd like to see her more before she does. *sigh*

Oh, and thanks to Nick for pointing out the glaring .css error (however, "bleed black and gold," my ass, btw). Hopefully, Stefan will have it fixed in a jiffy. Stupid Netscape. I'd fix it personally, but I don't have a clue what you're talking about. I just make it look pretty, and Stefan writes all the messy code for it. Right now, we're working on a splash, so that you can access either my rants or his rants by clicking on an image. It's still in the prototypical stages as of yet, but stay tuned. I'm still trying to get him to get around to either a) using the design I made for him for his blog, or b) designing one he likes better. He's also supposedly working on a writeback system and an archives for me. But it's Stefan, so I'm not holding out much hope. Gotta love him, though . . .

Ugh, I'm doing this reading for my Comics and Communism class, and it's so irritating. Everything he writes is tautological, and, as a result, he never ends up saying anything but useless aphorisms that he has numbered consecutively one through fifty-three. That's a lotta nonsense. Number nine is especially good: "In a world that really has been turned on its head, truth is a moment of falsehood." WTF does THAT mean? Luckily, I don't appear to be the only one who thinks so. The class messageboard has this post from this other guy who feels the same way: "WTF?"

I think I'll ignore the rest of his hopelessly redundant argument and move on to the comic, which is "American Splendor," and makes even LESS sense!

Mail is Good.

off the top:
So, perhaps the Bondra deal won't happen after all. I don't blame them for not taking Ottawa's offer. Schastlivy plus a draft pick ain't all that great a deal . . .

the score:
No game until tomorrow night. I can't wait. I seem to schedule all my time around hockey.

Until then, however, check out this article about hockey and physics.

off the ice:
Last night was the Senators at your Service dinner for charity. APPARENTLY, all Swedes are not blond. Alfie's fiance, looking fabulous only eight months after giving birth, is a brunette. So there's hope for all puck bunnies everywhere!

in other news:
I don't know if it's the attitude of this website's host rubbing off on me or not, but I find myself in a mild state of melancholia these days.

I think it partly has to do with the weather. There's a strange sort of isolation that comes with fridgid temperatures and the odd sensation of never being truly warm. People are huddled into themselves, with a look of introspection glazing across their eyes. People go from Point A to Point B without stopping or looking around, and there's none of that cameraderie about the cold that exists when it's only minus twelve or so.

I think another problem is that I've reached that point in term when I have an established daily routine that rarely varies: get up. Go to work. Go to school. Do homework. Maybe watch hockey. Go to sleep. Rinse. Repeat. I read my horoscope on my lunchbreak today. It told me to go for a drastic change in my choice of career and life path. I thought, NAH. I already went through that hassle in November. So I guess I'm ahead of schedule.

I got a letter from Rachelle this morning. It was in a bright green envelope, and it was covered in "Finding Nemo" stickers. The contents, written entirely in pink, made me laugh out loud (Chel, you got it from NICK??? GEBUS). But that was just one bright spot in an otherwise dull day. It's disconcerting to think that, once I finish school, this is the rest of my life, day in and day out. At least when I'm at school, I get breaks in routine.

One such break is coming up soon. Reading Week. Although this year, I won't get to see as many people. Cait will be in Orlando, Sarah will be in Winnipeg, and Lisa will remain in Providence. I shouldn't really complain about Cait and Sarah, because they're in town NOW, but I'm just trying to make myself look as pathetic as possible. Hear me out. I bet dollars to donuts that Nini isn't coming home. She usually has too much work to do. Sam and Jay are going to Vegas. So it's just me, and Chel, and Stef, and Jon, really. Boo-urns.

Enough of the downers. Here's some news for you: Stefan *says* that he's working on a writeback system, so if you want him to get on with it, hassle him, not me.

Also, Jen today made the *startling* realization that I haven't yet put up any pictures of Ottawa's Golden Boy, Mr. Wade Redden. So here you go, Office Wench. Enjoy. ;)

Frikkin' Cold!

off the top:
Gotta love consistency in the media. There was this thing in the Ottawa Citizen wherein they discussed the fact that Jason Spezza was disappointed not to have made the YoungStars team. But the article also said that Spezza took it very well. Then, in the Ottawa Sun, there's this huge article, with the headline reading something like, "Spezza does not take YoungStar snub well." Same day. Good lord.

the score:
Woohoo! The next eight games are televised in Ottawa!

AND

Thursday's game against the Dogs and Mr. Shutout himself doesn't start until 9:00, so I won't miss it. YEEHAW.

off the ice:
Apparently, Petr Schastlivy's problem is that he's allergic to Russia. Every time he goes back there, he gets some kind of skin ailment that makes him play poorly.

Riiiight . . .

Poor Josh Langfeld. He's doing really well, and he might have to go back down. At least he's making it difficult for the coaching staff to just send him back down to Bingo outright.

With the concussion to Scott Stevens, Chara might make the AllStar team after all!

in other news:
It's hard to make an informative post when there hasn't been a game on. And when it's been so bloody cold that no one has gone out and done anything newsworthy.

I might be going skating tonight (indoors) with Stefan. I should be sore tomorrow. Wish me luck!

PETA vs. Peter

off the top:
PETA vs. Peter

I have successfully increased my readership by the grand total of ONE. Cait's dad added me to his favourite's list. Now I'm intimidated, and should probably watch my language . . .

I bought skates today! They were stupid expensive, but they are actually really comfy, and if they ever become uncomfortable, they have this thing where I put them on and put my feet in a special oven to make them fit perfectly. Sort of like in the sixties when everyone was shrinking their Levi's to fit properly. The guy who helped me get them was rather entertained when I told him precisely WHY I needed to learn how to play hockey. I bet he doesn't get that very often . . . thanks to Stefan for coming and getting them with me, btw. I wouldn't have had a clue what to do.

the score:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Cait and Jon and Stef and I went to Sergeant's to watch the game. It was pretty funny to see. Not the most exciting game in the world, but all the goals were pretty ones. And, as Cait said, technically, we scored all ten of the goals. If Langfeld had only knocked that first one past the Rangers' goalie instead of Patty, then we would have a score of ten to nothing. Not that it really matters. He scored again to make up for it.

I wanted Chara or Smokey to get a hat trick tonight, but it wasn't to be. When they talk about scoring depth on the Senators' team, they really mean it. No less than twelve Sens figured on the scoresheet tonight, most of them more than once. Too bad Hossa didn't score.

And as for Jagr, was he on the ice tonight? Apparently, but we didn't see much of him. Although he played about nineteen minutes, he only managed to register ONE shot on goal. And he's supposed to be the Rangers' saving grace? I'm sorry, did you look at the score tonight? I guess they're STILL two points out of a playoff spot. Tough luck. They shoulda gotten someone a helluva lot cheaper, and a helluva lot better.

Boo, Jason Spezza didn't make the YoungStars team. I'm miffed, especially after that goal he had that went top shelf -- AND STUCK THERE.

off the ice:
Speaking of trades, rumours are flying thick and fast over Ottawa's stars. First on the block is Schastlivy. Ottawa doesn't want him; unfortunately, neither does anyone else. As I've said before, the boy has a shot like a bullet, but it never hits the net. It's like he's still afraid to play after missing most of last season with an injury. He needs to get over himself.

Bonk might have saved his own ass in the past couple of games. He's still not quite up to snuff, but he's getting there, and I know Martin wants to give him all the chances he can, so he's safe -- for a while.

As for the rumours about Bondra -- I dunno. I've only seen him play a few times, and I have to say, I wasn't really impressed. However, Hossa apparently has a serious man-crush on him. So if the best scorer on Ottawa's team thinks he's a good scorer, he must be a-one. We'll see. Depends on how much he's going to cost.

GMs the league over are muttering about acquiring the likes of Phillips, Schaefer, and even Alfredsson. Do they honestly think that Ottawa is going to let these boys go? Alfie, for sure, is going NOWHERE. They're going to work out a new contract for him ASAP, and I'll bet you anything he'll be making closer to six mil after all the t's are crossed.

Now for the goalie problem. Ray Emery is champing at the bit to come into his own place in the NHL. Muckler's doing everything he can to make it so. But, as we've seen with Detroit, a rotating three-goalie system works about as well as a square wheel. So that means that, if they bring Razor up, they're going to have to get rid of one of the dudes in the net right now. And you know what? As much as I love him, I think Patty's going to be the one to go. I don't know where, but I think it should be him. He's just not getting any better. At all. He can't handle the puck, and he sure as hell can't skate. Super-k isn't the best, either, but he can handle the puck, and he can skate. He may be a little awkward in handling rebounds, but he's improving. Every time he plays, he gets better. I think Martin should give him a shot at some playoff games this spring, just to prove it, once and for all. Otherwise, he'll never get that chance to show off his skill (check out these stats!), and he'll get shunted off somewhere else at the earliest opportunity. And it just won't be fair. Being the number one goaltender does not, and should not, guarantee tenure. And that's all I have to say about that.

in other news:
I watched "American Wedding" today. Now that is an awkward movie. I found myself laughing in spite of it all, however. Hmm . . . perhaps hanging out with so many boys has lowered my classiness level and I now find purile and base humour entertaining.

So it's a good thing that two of my best friends, Caitlin and Sarah are now in town for an extended period of time. I need some girl exposure.

And no, Rachelle -- I know what you're thinking. It will not turn me away from hockey. They love it too. Perhaps not as much as I do, but enough. Not like watching a game with Chel -- it's like pulling teeth. She complains constantly, even though she gets even with me by making me see stupid movies like Scooby Doo and Lara Croft and Lara Croft 2. At least I don't complain as loudly. And she's making me see Scooby Two when it comes out. THAT MEANS PLAYOFF HOCKEY, CHEL! HAHAHAHAHA!

After the game tonight, I followed Cait in the car back to her house, and we hung out. She's all unpacked, so it looks pretty permanent in her room, but it's odd to be in her house in January. I usually only see her at Christmas, Reading Week, and during the summer. So it's odd. I think I'll get used to it pretty quickly, though. She seemed really keen on joining our little expeditions to Sergeant's to watch the game when it's blacked out at home.

Welcome home, Caitydid. It should be fun.

Macho, Macho Men?

off the top:
EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

Your tax rubles at work.

the score:
I'm annoyed that, once again, the Ottawa Senators lose out in HNIC. I know the CBC is biased towards Toronto, but this is RIDICULOUS.

Check out what the instigator has to say about officiating in the league.

off the ice:
So Tie Domi's wife finally blew a gasket and made him wear a face shield. Too bad she can't make him wear a black shield. Then it might hide the fact that he's a mean little s.o.b. . . .

I'm suprised that it's him, though, that he's the tough guy to start the trend (if he actually ends up following through with his promise, that is). But after his teammates Nolan and Tucker were taken out of the lineup with serious eye injuries needing surgery, he decided that it might be a good idea to protect his vision.

Let this go on record that this is the first time in history I support anything Wee Domi has said. I think this is a great idea, and that other tough guys in the league should consider it. If they want to fight, they can just do as Domi says, and take off their helmets. It's that simple.

The Leafs aren't the only ones to have close calls with eye injuries. In March 2000, a follow-through from a Marian Hossa slapshot accidentally caught Bryan Berard in the eye, rendering him blind on one side. Hossa insists that this incident didn't affect his game, but the stats disagree. And let's not forget those scary few weeks last season, after Shane Hnidy was hit in the eye with a puck during practise, and the team had to wait for the blood to clear from the eye before they could tell if he would be able to play again.

So, to the precious handful of you who read my rants, let this be a lesson to you!

in other news:
THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!

I don't really have much else to say, except that.

My weekend so far is shaping up to be peaceful, which is what I need. I'm planning on seeing LOTR (for the second time) with Sarah, and I think Stefan is being forced (by Jon) to buy me skates at some point soon. The rest of my time will likely be spent catching up on my oceanography readings and other mundane things, like doing laundry, harassing my brother (ever googled your brother before?), and the like. Not exciting. Not depressing. Just normal. *sigh*

The Longest Week -- And It's Not Over!

off the top:
THANK YOU FOR THE COOKIES, STEFAN!

the score:
I only saw the last seven or so minutes of the second, and the entirety of the third. I had class (which I will mention below). A lot of penalties called, which is surprising, as Kevin Pollock was on the ice. But these were good calls tonight, the officials preventing the clutch and grab game that the Pens always play in order to stop the Sens.

And what a game! It was very exciting, because it was close to the end. Now, I know what you're thinking: Ottawa 6, Pittsburg 5? What is this? A dream? No. For some bizarro reason, Ottawa just can't seem to figure out the lowest-ranking, lowest-scoring team in the league. Out of three games this season, the first was an OT loss, the next was a tie, and this is the only time this year that Ottawa has beaten them. It's really weird.

Pulling Marc-Andre Fleury from the net was a good call on the Penguins' side. He just wasn't having a good night. But boy, is he flexible! He did this nifty Roxette-like kick that was quite impressive.

The best play, by far, was in the dying minutes of the second. Hossa had the puck, as he seemed to for a long time that period. He was tripped up, but managed to maintain puck control, even when he was down on his stomach, dekeing it around Penquins and finally passing it along to make a third goal for Langfeld. It was amazing.

off the ice:
I'm rather annoyed that Chara didn't make the All-Star cut, but I suppose I'll have to be satisfied with three of our players (Alfredsson, Hossa, Redden) representing for the team. Haha, the Pens get NO PLAYERS on the All-Star Team.

what to do about Petr Schastlivy? The man has a shot like a bullet (you can hear the crack), but he can't score. Or do much else, for that matter. It's a pity no one else wants him, because this means that, when Vermette recovers from his shoulder injury, Langfeld will have to go back down to Bingo, and Josh has been having a great week.

in other news:
This week has been positively interminable. I've wanted to shoot almost every person I've come in contact with. I totally blew my chiropractor's appointment on Monday, and had to reschedule for next Monday, which, as it turns out, is kind of a good thing. Yesterday, I was going out to get a pee sample from one of my dogs (she's diabetic), and I managed to fall all the way down the back steps. There's about six of them. So now I have a bump on the back of my head, a sore neck and shoulder, and no skin on my right wrist. I was grumpy.

It seems everyone else had a weird week, too. I went to my Intro to Culture Studies class tonight (I like to call it my Comics and Communism Class), and the content was almost inpenetrable. It's discussion-based, and there's only about fifteen of us, so when you don't contribute, you can tell. So, when about half the class left at the break, my prof got rather irritable. He got the remaining members of the class to organize ourselves in this little circle and tell us exactly what was wrong with how he was teaching. AND THEN HE STARTED TO CRY! It was an awkward night, that's for sure.

But then, it turns out, Stefan baked me cookies, which were much appreciated by my family, BTW. And I got paid today, which is a day early, and I got a raise, which no one told me about. So it's all good -- I think. I don't know what else to say about anything, because my whole day was rather disjointed, and my neck's kind of sore, so I'm going to end this and go to bed. Good night, all.

I Took Notes!

off the top:
In the NHL rulebook, figure skates were previously referred to as "fancy skates." Go figure.

I have a tremendous urge to punch Greg Millen. Not only does he consistently foul up player's names and stats, but he keeps calling Smokey "SCHMOlinski." GRRRAUGH! That would be like people calling me "Bella." What a dork.

Oh, and what the hell is the alternate logo for the 'Canes? It looks like a tattered flag flying from a hockey stick. What flag is that?

the score:
So, the grand total of about two thousand people who were at the game tonight had absolutely no idea what constituted a call in the game. They were cheering on offsides, and booing perfectly legitimate penalties. I don't think these southerners should be allowed to have hockey. They just don't get it. Due to the lack of accoustically deafening bodies, you could pretty much hear everything said both on and off the ice. Heehee, there was this little Sens fan there. It was cute.

An interesting stat that I learned from the colour folks, when they weren't goofing off: the combined goals from the top scorers on the Hurricanes' team is only four more than the goals made by Marian Hossa alone this season.

And what a night for Mr. Hossa it was. Now, forget my personal biases for a moment and let's have ourselves a little Hossa love-in. When he wasn't getting a piece of all three goals tonight (1-2), he was passing perfectly to his teammates and making all the right plays. A good example of this would be the beautiful pass to Langfeld in the first that he only just failed to convert (as an aside, poor Josh -- he really got nailed a couple of times tonight! Well, I guess that's what he's here for). In Hossa's case, bigger is definitely better. There were two occasions when, realizing his capacity to magically disappear like Superman, one of the 'Canes tangled him up at the blue line. In the first period, he just turned around and decked the guy. In the third, he held on to the puck long enough to pass it to Vanner, who potted his first of the season into the empty net. And speaking of Superman, have you seen Hossa skate? Well, if you watched tonight's game, you would've seen numerous examples of him turning on the afterburners and leaving the opposing team far behind. That man is FAST. And he was so smiley tonight. Definitely in a good mood. It was very cute. Sorry, personal bias slipping in here. Can you see why he's my favourite player, though?

What else happened this game?

Jacques Martin wore a hideously ugly suit. I don't know what he was thinking. I know where he got it, too, and I'm amazed they sell something that disgusting.

Poor Super-K. First, he loses yesterday's game. Then, because Carolina doesn't know how to build a hockey arena, there's no room for him to sit behind the Ottawa bench, so he has to sit by himself in the hallway off the corner near the visitor's net. He looked so lonely. There weren't even any people near enough to heckle him. Awww . . . I really want to pinch his cheeks. He's super.

In the first period, there were a lot of steals, which made it a little bit more exciting. You also got to see some of Patty's improved puckhandling skills. Now, the rubber generally goes in the direction he sends it. Not to mention he was mega skilled in saves, tonight, too.

The second was again a Hossa show, with a few other players, like Schaefer, Rachunek, and Spezza, showing that they, too, were having a good night. Neil showed that he was a gentleman after totally winning a fight and then not going in for the kill. He's definitely getting better at his inside rights . . . Pothier made a terrible giveaway that I'm sure he's still kicking himself for, but Patty saved his ass, so it was all good. I blame Vanner for the 'Canes only goal of the night. Sure, he took his penalty before Rachunek did, but his was stupid, while Rachunek's was questionable, so in the ensuing 5-on-3 face-off in their zone, poor Patty didn't have a chance. I guess he made up for it, though, by scoring with 2 seconds to go in the third. In the second, Carolina seemed to wake up a bit, and there were amazing scoring chances on both sides.

I think Ottawa was smart in picking black for their shorts colour. Other teams, when they fall on their asses a lot, tend to look like they've had an accident, because the snow melts on their butts and darkens whatever colour they're wearing. Carolina is especially bad for that.

A few words about the state of officiating. I heard that Kevin Pollock was one of the referees and I groaned, knowing that he never calls anything that needs to be called, and always happens to see the questionable plays. In the first and second period, though, I thought maybe I should change my opinion. In the third, I changed it back. The referees are what's wrong with the NHL, folks. Everybody knows it, but only a few, like Roenick and Hossa, will say it. And they get nailed for it. It's not a matter of removing the red line, making no-touch icing, or widening the ice. It's a matter of cracking down on cheaters and cleaning up the game.

So, the third was rife with cheating, and Spezza bore the brunt of it, with a high stick to his already tender jaw. As a result, it was not an exciting period, and tensions were high. You could chalk the 'Canes high spirits up to the "trade energy" generated by acquiring Williams, but I think it was the huge open-ice hit to Alfie that really raised the Sens' dander and got them fighting back. Kudos to Chara for standing up for his little cap'n.

All in all, it was a game worth seeing, and I hope you did.

off the ice:
Congratulations, Martin Havlat on being the NHL's offensive player of the week. With seven points (3-4) in three games and a +4 rating, I can believe it. Tied for third in scoring on the team with Jason Spezza, he has certainly made a comeback from the prima donna who missed training camp. Critics feared that he would become the next Jagr, known more for his hysterics on and off the ice than for his scoring ability. But young Marty has persevered this season, keeping mum about accusations by other teams that he is a dirty player, practising hard, playing harder, and generally showing the world that he deserves to be on this team. Well done!

in other news:
I'm not sure what to think about this new movie. It's got Hugh Jackman in it, and he's on my "list of five," so I'm obviously going to see it, but I think it looks a little cheesy. Is this based on something I should know about? Some book, or comic, or something?

Phat-Ass

off the top:
who in their right mind would play a game at NOON on a MONDAY? how the hell is anyone going to enjoy THAT? I mean, sure, it's only against the islanders, but even still . . .

the score:
feck and feck and feck. martin luther king day, my ass. they just wanted to play a game where the senators would be at the disadvantage of not having any psychic support from their fans, because they were all busy at work, while the americans were slacking off, on a holiday of which most of them are probably ignorant of the true meaning. in any case, it means that my team lost and their team won, which is embarrassing.

actually, I shouldn't say that. like the 4-4 tie of a few days ago, ottawa managed to ruin the islanders' 2-0 lead and tie the game. which means that ottawa took advantage of some serious new york mistakes. then, apparently, they fucked up, big time. but I wouldn't know. I was in sex class during the game, and couldn't even listen to it on the radio. *sigh* not that I'm bitter, or anything . . .

off the ice:
do you think that goalies ever get get self-conscious about their butts? I mean, they spend most of the game with their padded posterior stuck out, looking for all the world like they're trying to take a dump in their diapers. not to mention the fact that the net cam, a.k.a. the goalie ass-cam has a fish-eye lens, which just exacerbates the problem.

I don't think lalime has a real problem. he's a pretty skinny guy, and every time he sneezes, he loses ten pounds. but what about the tubbier goalies, like brodeur? I bet he cries inside every time he watches a replay from the net. d'you think that they're reluctant to put on their pads in the morning? do they stand in front of the mirror every day, staring at their butts, asking their wives, "do these pants make my butt look fat?"

in other news:
I watched two mushy movies yesterday, when I should have been doing homework. I *acquired* them from the internet. don't tell anybody. I watched "Something's Gotta Give," which was actually very amusing. my brother Chris got all uncomfortable when Diane Keaton kissed Keanu Reeves. apparently, she was just as uncomfortable doing it, especially as they apparently also shot a love scene together. that's just weird. I'm rather glad it didn't make the final edit. but, it had a neat ending, and it was nicely understated, which has been a trend in movies I've watched recently. I appreciate it. and I really hope I look like that when I'm in my mid-fifties. she hasn't had any plastic surgery, and she looks amazing. my mother isn't all that wrinkly, and she's about that age. here's hoping I got the right genes . . .

I also watched "Love Actually." another very good film, based on the intertwined worlds of several sets of characters. the intro is neat, a little soliloquy by hugh grant on the arrivals gate at heathrow airport. and the sets of characters are so star-studded you have to wear shades to watch the movie. I mean, it's all british stars, but if you watch a lot of british movies, you'll know who they are and you will be impressed. my favourite set was liam neeson and his stepson. they were incredibly cute together. there was one set that didn't really seem to fit too well into the whole web of people knowing people, and they only had a tenuous connection, but their story was funny all the same. if you liked "Bridget Jones' Diary," you'll like this -- and not only because colin firth is in it.

holy crap it was cold today. I stupidly assumed that, as it wasn't half so cold as it was last week, that I wouldn't have to wear longjohns to school. they just make me feel like my ass is enormous. as a consequence, I'm still trying to get the circulation back into my legs, and I've been home nearly 45 minutes . . . let this be a lesson to you, children: dress warmly. I met my brother coming to school through the Farm as I was coming home. I would recognize that boy's walk a mile away. he walks like a sailor who has spent his entire life at sea. it's very amusing.

I have this tremendous urge to accomplish absolutely fuck-all tonight. I wish there was a game on . . .

Hockey Hair is a Privilege, not a Right

off the top: just when you thought jeremy roenick couldn’t possibly
get any uglier . . .

the score: good game last night. super-k made some fabulous saves. I know. I was sitting about two feet from an enormous big screen television. there was this guy behind me who was ridiculously drunk (and this is by about 8:00 PM) and was yelling at the tv in a slurred fashion. *sigh* they can't hear you, guy.

I feel bad for joe thornton. jacques martin always rolls chara when he's on the ice. that must hurt a lot. I love watching people try to take chara down and then just bounce right off him as he skates off. the best was his fight against barnaby on november 20. I was about fifteen feet away from him at the time. that man is big.

it was a long game, though. it might have just been that I was tired and full of food, but it took forever. shattering the glass behind the net didn't help, either. and I was rather annoyed at the end when they just dicked around. I mean, after such a long delay, they should have at least made it interesting to watch. I know, it would've been rude to run up the score, but they could have done something. then again, maybe it was just me. I don't think sitting that close to the tv is a good idea. we'll see if I'm sterile . . .

off the ice: would somebody please explain to me the allure of hockey hair? is it more comfortable to wear a helmet when you've got a mullet? what possible reason could you have for making yourself look like a woman? poor alfie. dearly as I love him, he will not escape my wrath. he hasn't gotten a haircut in over a year. he keeps it long, apparently, because his girlfriend likes it. seems she also likes him to wear her clothes, as you can see in the picture of the day. and people make fun of him for it, like right here. I'll never forget going to that game with stefan. they were announcing the stars, and they put a picture of alfie up on the jumbotron, and stefan yelled out, "get a haircut, you fucking hippie!" everybody laughed. it was highly amusing. especially coming from stefan.

in other news: HAPPY TWENTY-FIRST, RACHELLE! oh, and, hi, folks, this is my page, courtesy of stefan. welcome to allyrxntz!