::alio!::

Um, excuse me? I believe you have my stapler . . .

off the top:

I am officially addicted to Riesen.

Did you know Spartacat has his own webpage? He scored the opening goal in the AllStars mascot game on Saturday. I don't know whether to be proud, or highly amused.

Seems the Sens are coming under Hockey-Humor.com's scrutiny more and more these days. Here's a little jab at Patty's problems.

the allstar score:

So I caved and watched the AllStar game Sunday afternoon. It was either that or write a ten-page midterm on Marxist Ideology as it relates to the Society of the Spectacle (if you know the answer, lemme know. The paper's due Thursday night).

Anyway, I'm kind of glad I did. I got to see some pretty passes and some nice moves by the likes of Kovalchuk and Sakic (hat trick), and Alfie scored two goals, the first and the fifth, in the Eastern Conference's 6-4 win over the Western Conference. Jagr still sucks, though, even when it doesn't count. At least Luongo didn't see as much rubber as he normally does. Heehee! Martin St. Louis is TINY. I find it hard to believe he's even the 5'9" they say he is. Theodore was wearing the wrong pants during the second period. I wonder if anyone noticed . . . Messier had an amazing game, even more amazing considering that he just turned 43. What's with his helmet, though? This has been bothering me for years. No one else in the league has a helmet like him. When it's red, like it was Sunday, he looks disturbingly like a Tootsie Pop.

I didn't know Eric McCormack (of Will & Grace fame) had dual citizenship. A nice singing voice, too . . .

Weird things about the AllStar game: seeing a face-off from UNDER the ice. Also, the weird remote control camera that swung around over centre ice made me feel like I was in a video game. Rather an odd sensation . . .

Ron MacLean had a nice little conversation with Bob Goodenough after the first period. They raised some nice points and you could really tell that Ronnie was on Bob's side in this whole thing. Then, after the second, he went on to talk to the Commish, and this debate didn't turn out so well. Every time Ron brought up a factoid he'd gleaned from somewhere, Bettman shot it down and ridiculed Ron's research, then complained about discussing the CBA on the AllStar Break. I wanted to smack him, and you could see that Ron did, too. He restrained himself, however, and merely commented that this was one of the few times he got to speak to the Commish, and this is what the fans wanted to know. Gary Bettman is a jerk. That's what I know now. I, for one, am very interested in what's going on in the negotiations (see "off the ice," below), and I think that part of Bettman's job is dealing with the media in an informative and polite manner. There was absolutely no call for him to be as childish and whiny as he was this afternoon. Bob answered the same questions and faced the same sort of heat with perfect aplomb. Makes me wonder who's going to win all this . . .

the real score:

FIRST PERIOD: The boys are back in toooooooooown! The Sens come out of the starting gate with a jump I haven't seen in many a game. They show up the clutching and grabbing Blues by using some physical strength of their own, particularly from the likes of Chara and Langfeld. The first is also a key example of Ottawa's superior stick handling skills, as even Rachunek shows his improvement by looking before he passes . . . Alfredsson scores 97 seconds in for his 25th goal of the season from White and Rachunek. Hossa gets some amazing chances before he scores his 24th from Phillips and Langfeld, and, shortly later, on an amazing breakaway, he hesitates just long enough to bring G Osgood out of position, and pots his 25th. Osgood, whose old-school mask doesn't cover the back of his neck and makes me nervous, gets pulled for the last minutes of the period. Young Kelly is having a nice night for his second NHL game, putting himself where he should be and creating lots of offense. Defense is also super in this period, and poor Patty doesn't have a lot of work to do. Shoutouts to Chara and Redden for standing up when they should, and to Leschyshyn, who keeps getting his ass kicked into the boards and remaining in the game. Ottawa 3, St. Louis 0.

SECOND PERIOD: Osgood is back in net, and seems to have recovered from his earlier malaise. The second is a Peter Schaefer show, with him amazing on the forecheck and even shorthanded, on three -- yes, THREE -- Ottawa penalties. None to STL, who are the third-most penalized team in the league. As Marty Havlat takes his seat in the penalty box for a stupid penalty, one happens to notice he's trying to emulate his best friend, Marian Hossa (read: the dude needs a haircut). Amazing offensive chances by Smolinski, Hossa, and Alfredsson, who rings a bullet off the crossbar, the second dinger of the night. An odd lineup that I noticed: Alfredsson, Spezza, and Havlat. Hmm . . . A period in which STL's best player, Chris Pronger, barely announces his presence. An Ottawa blueliner who does: Simpson. Heehee! He sticks out his tongue when he's working hard. Lalime was strong on all three power plays tonight, keeping it simple and making textbook saves with utmost confidence. This looks more like the Patty we saw last May. And you'd never notice that Chara was not at 100%, as he admitted yesterday. Playing hard, skating hard, hitting hard, he's looking good. Flagrant high stick to Alfie and then an embarrassing dump that wasn't called leads to high tensions at the end of the period. Ottawa 3, St. Louis 0.

THIRD PERIOD: What's with Danton? The wee 5'9" forward spent most of the evening trying to pick a fight with Chara and Simpson. At one point, Chara looked at him, smiled, and shook his head. He couldn't believe it. I wouldn't personally pick on someone who is over a foot taller and nearly a hundred pounds heavier than myself, if I were Danton. As it is, Chara is fourteen inches taller and well over a hundred pounds heavier than me. I would be very nice to him. The refs finally called some penalties in Ottawa's favour, but they couldn't convert on the resulting 5-on-3, although Schaefer was wicked around the boards, and Hossa rang one off the crossbar. Bonk was conspicuously absent for the third, which would explain that odd line that I mentioned before. Apparently, he took a puck off the skate, and was last seen on crutches, with an ice pack strapped to his foot. At one point, the camera cut to a prolonged shot of Schaefer and his ridicuStick, staring off into space with a dreamy smile on his face. I wonder what he was thinking about . . . Well, Danton being annoying actually worked. He got Chara off his game enough to ruin Patty's shutout bid and make the game 3-1. I think I jinxed Patty, though, as I caught myself thinking the "s-word" shortly before he was scored on. The Senators slowed down a little in the third, and were a little sloppy with their puckhandling. A guilty party was Alfredsson, although he made up for it in the dying minutes. The officials were also a little sloppy, failing to see an obvious high stick to the face of Chris Phillips, and not taking any notice of a Spezza skirmish at centre ice. There was a tense moment as Rachunek let one fly, but there was no one to catch the rebound, and Neil's later attempt was ruled a no-goal. Then, with Osgood on the bench, White, who hasn't scored in ten games, took a shot at the empty net and really missed. Patty, on a clearing attempt a few seconds later, nearly netted his first of the year. And he only missed a little bit. It was a good way to snap the three-game losing streak, and we saw the kind of play by Ottawa that we're supposed to see.

The shot to Hossa's head and his subsequent rest period is the best thing that could've happened to him. He was superb tonight, as were the rest of his beleaguered teammates, Patty included. Schaefer didn't register a point, but was everywhere at every time, working around the boards, backchecking, forechecking, checking . . . And Patty? Well, he showed us tonight why he's number one. No fancy stuff, but simple stops with no rebounds, saves made with the utmost confidence, and no scrambling. You could see it in his face. He knew he had this game down. Let's just hope it continues. I mean, as much as I love Super-K, it's hard to lose a number one.

off the ice:

So Ottawa isn't the only city with goalie trouble. Hasek's out for the rest of the season in Detroit with a recurring groin injury, and Philly's Jeff Hackett was forced to retire last night, because he has been unable to recover from the situational vertigo plaguing him since his last concussion. Now, I'm not going to get all Don Cherry on his ass. I will simply say, so long, Jeff. It's been good to know you.

I'm really worried about the 15 September 2004 expiration of the CBA between the NHL and the NHLPA. It's not just that it means I might not be able to watch hockey for a year or two -- this directly affects me.

For the maybe two of you who read this and don't know me, I'm an anthropology student in Ottawa. Next year, I will graduate with an honours degree, and it is my hope to do my masters degree in Ritual and Symbolism in Professional Hockey. It's rather a grand thesis title, and I'm quite pleased with myself for coming up with it. What it would entail, essentially, is studying the inner workings of a professional team, asking the players questions, and examining what their every day rituals are regarding the game and how they play it. Like Super-K talking to himself between the pipes, and Neil changing of his laces before every game. Stuff like that. As for the symbolism, hell, it's everywhere in this corporate climate of ours. You just have to look at the logos on the sweaters to see that. There are other symbols, too, like the various gestures a referee performs when he's making a call. You know what I mean. Ideally, I'd like to do this research with the Senators, and, also ideally, if they like me enough, I'd like to do my PhD with them -- a full-scale ethnography of the organization.

This is my dream. And, strangely enough, for a girl who never gets the dice rolling her way, this dream might *actually* come true. There are very few obstacles preventing me from getting what I want. I have a few connections I can work on, and, even if they fall through, it's great PR for the team. I don't see why they wouldn't want me to come and talk to them.

HOWEVER

This CBA trouble could fuck me over, big time. If they're out for a year, I guess I could go in after that, but I probably need to have this all present and accounted for by January of next year, when I send in my application for grad school. The administration at my school is notoriously vague for explaining exactly how I do this, but I hope to be illuminated soon.

So, here's my question: do I contact them before the playoffs this season, telling them who I am and what I'm interested in doing, sort of sounding them out on their opinion? Do I wait until after the playoffs? During the playoffs? If I wait until next year, I'm afraid that I won't have access to the kind of people I need to talk to to get this done. No CBA equals no workers, right? I suppose, if worse comes to worst, I can hook myself up with some WHA team, but even that's still a nebulous possibility.

I still have a month and a bit before the playoffs. I don't want to bother anybody during that time. I also feel squeamish about writing to them after the playoffs, and not just because of the CBA. I feel like, if they win, the organization will just think I want to latch on to the champion team. And, if they lose, they'll be that much more disinclined to acquiesce to my request. So I should do it soon, right? First, I gotta think of what to say . . .

Maybe I should set up an appointment with the grad school department.

in other news:

This midterm is going to kill me. I'm not too worried about my oceanography midterm, as most of it I remember from first year geoscience, but this Marxist ideology crap has really got me confused. I mean, I understand it all when we're discussing it in class, but in no conceivable way could I recreate, from my hopelessly unintelligible notes, what was said at any given time. For example, I have, from my first class, "HEGEL --> lack: the object is outside of us, and that's what drives the whole thing." Then I have an altered thesis/antithesis/synthesis diagram about being and nothingness. *sigh* I think I'm screwed. I can't possibly write ten pages about something I barely understand. There's only so much I can pull out of my ass at any given moment.

I'm vaguely annoyed with my Winamp. I have my four thousand plus collection on random, but I'm mostly getting a weird combination of Cecilia Bartoli, AFI, and Dashboard. It's like my computer is deciding what I want to listen to. I would prefer a Platters/Foreigner/Miles Davis/Rachmaninov combo, but it's ignoring me . . .

I woke up this morning thinking about my friend Lisa, and I had this odd thought that, hey, wouldn't it be nice if I got an email from her today? AND I DID!

I won a major battle against redundancy today at work. I felt really proud of myself. I just clearly and politely outlined the many ways in which it was a dumb fucking idea, and how it was pointless, seeing as I had been using an efficient system all along, and ignoring his.

AND

I got a new stapler. This is momentous. I love it. It's liddle and gray. I wanted a red one to match all my other desk accessories, but they didn't have one that wasn't a million dollars. Baby steps, people . . . (Yes, I realize I'm a loser mcpete, but it's a NEW FREAKING STAPLER, goddamnit!) I also got my T4, which means I can file my income tax as early as next week, and therefore get my return super soon. *shudder* My ever-creepy ex-boss, Gary, showed up in the office today. Whatever beefs I have with the expectorating goobermonster, he's a far sight better than Gary. Chel called the office this afternoon, so I got to speak to her, albeit briefly. So, all things considered, it was a good day.

Ottawa weather is weird. Today, the sun was shining, the birds were singing, a soft breeze was wafting along . . . and it was snowing heavily. Hmm . . . and then one of those huge fat snowflakes managed to bypass my scarf and my sweater and went straight down my cleavage. I don't know how snow does that, but it's incredibly annoying. Especially when you have to explain to a boy why you suddenly yelped and jumped six feet in the air.

I'm so pleased with myself! During the game, I attempted something I have never tried before: a French braid. I was aiming for pigtails, but I lack that much skill. I'm pretty impressed with my first attempt, though. I suppose it would have been better if my hair was all one length, and I had a mirror, but what can you do? Good night, folks! Drive carefully and sleep well!

Posted by Ally at February 10, 2004 12:00 AM